Weekly Challenge

When was the last time you looked at your paycheck stub? Most paychecks now are electronic so you have to be intentional to look it up online. It’s not just the amount that gets deposited that you need to review. It’s all the deductions…the money you don’t see. It is your responsibility to make sure it is correct so you don’t have a big surprise at tax season.

Easy Challenge:
Look at your last pay stub. Do you understand what each deduction line means? If not, google it or ask your HR. Are the dollar amounts correct?

Medium Challenge:
Look at your past months paychecks. We’re there any differences?

Hard Challenge:
Start setting long term goals for your money. Long term means 5+ years out. Maybe it’s to earn a certain dollar amount which means you need to work for a promotion or starting a side hustle. Maybe it’s to have a certain amount in your 401k which means you may need to contribute more to it now?

Tip: Make sure you at least match your employers 401k match. That’s easy free money to you. That’s the minimum amount you should contribute.

Think about the last time you gave your time or money to a church or non-profit. How did you feel afterwards? Giving not only helps others, but makes us feel good inside too.

This week’s challenge is about doing it intentional instead of reactively. Reactively means without much pre thought put into it.

Ready for your challenge?

Easy: Think of causes that tug on your heart. Those causes that mean something to you. Find 1-2 ways that you could give your time or money to them.

Medium: Now do those 1-2 ways you thought of in your easy challenge. Put your action where your thoughts are.

Hard: Giving (especially if it means something to you) should never be a one and done thing. Sign up to be a regular volunteer. Set up a reoccurring automatic donation. Be intentional with what God has given you.

Week 2 of our financial challenges and this is about saving money. Creating an “emergency fund” in case you need to pay a insurance deductible, unexpected medical bill, appliance went out, or even if you lose your job. It can seem impossible to save money especially with the cost of everything going up. I can promise you that piece of mind where you won’t have to ask your parents or increase your credit card will be worth it! Using what you learned last week on where you could potentially cut back and save.
I am going to preach some Dave Ramsey here. If you are in debt, you still need at least a $1000 emergency fund. This will help you not stop the momentum of paying off your debts even if something happens.

Easy Challenge: Decide why you need an emergency fund. Knowing why you are doing it will help you stick to it.

Medium Challenge: Investigate how to set up an automatic transfer either through the bank or your paycheck. You can set up multiple accounts with your paycheck. Doing it this way, it’s almost like you never had the money to start with. Instead of seeing what’s leftover, you pay yourself first.

Hard Challenge: Now you have your why, set your goal for the year. Divide that by 12 to know what your monthly savings would need to be. Set up your automatic transfers to achieve that goal.

Changing focus from relationships to finances for these next 10 challenges. Yes…the dreaded F word…. At least that was what I used to think. Money was this thing we didn’t talk about and honestly it’s still hard to talk about. Once you have the mindset that you control your money and not your money controlling you it does get easier. In order to do that you have to intentionally choose where you spend your money. You need to stop mindlessly spending without realizing it. But first let’s focus on the D word…debt.

Easy challenge: Don’t spend any money for one day. Instead of spending the money, write down how much you saved for the day. For example, morning coffee ($5), lunch ($15), soft drink and snack at break ($5), dinner at restaurant ($30). That’s $55 you would have spent when you could have planned ahead and made coffee at home. Packed leftovers for lunch. Then made dinner at home with the food you already have.

Medium Challenge: now that you actually realize how much you would spend. Cut back on this spending and reallocate it to your debt.

Hard Challenge: Pick one debt and an amount you want to pay off by the end of the month. I’m a Dave Ramsey fan so my advice is to pick the lowest debt amount. This way you can see progress and knock them out. Using what you learned in easy/medium challenges, make the plan on how to get that amount and do it.

Last challenge for the relationship part. Yes! You made it to challenge #10.
This week is about being intentional about our own wants & needs. It’s about making sure that you have your together time with others, but you also make time to be alone with someone that you enjoy. It’s your time to fill your cup back up so you are your best self with others.

Challenge Levels:
Easy: Do one thing by yourself that you completely enjoy. It could be sitting outside reading a book, going for a hike, and on and on. It’s something you do for you. It’s your me time.

Medium: Do something out of your comfort zone. Something that you always wanted to do, but feel like others around you would judge you or make fun of you. Or trade turns with your significant other or best friend to pick something you have never done and do it together. You will find you like to do more things than you think. It’s opening infinite possibilities.

Hard: Don’t rely for your significant other or your best friend to complete you. You need to stay connected to what makes you, you. It’s easy to lose who you are sometimes when you keep going with the crowd or what the other person wants. You don’t have to make decisions and sometimes that feels great. Don’t get too comfortable. Be yourself. That’s what attracted them to you in the first place.

This week’s challenge is about trusting what our gut is telling us instead of always listening to those around us. Listening to our gut sounds simple, but can be complicated in real life. Learning to key into your instincts and understand the difference between emotional response and true intuition is challenging.

Easy: Think about someone you trust and how that trust makes you feel. That’s the feeling you want. If someone doesn’t make you feel this way your gut is telling you to back away.

Medium: Give yourself space and time for those difficult decisions between emotion and gut. Take a night to sleep on it.

Hard: Follow through on that decision you have taken the time to think about. This is the hardest because it might not be the most popular decision with the people around you. You need to do what is right for you though.

This week is about staying curious instead of furious. In every relationship we go through a time of irritation, annoyance, hurt feelings. This week is about not assuming you understand what the other person is thinking and feeling. It may come as a shock, but no 2 people think the same way in every situation .

The Easy Challenge:
Check your assumptions in situations you are not fully happy with. Ask them, “What did you mean by that?” Or “Why do you feel that way?” And then actually really listen to the answer. This is how we grow as a person and friend.

The Medium Challenge:
Think of a situation where you don’t want to do something. Now think about really why you don’t want to do it. Maybe it’s a get together every week that you would rather go once a month, but you feel guilty. Invite your curiosity to see what emotions come up and why.

The Hard Challenge:
Actually practice curiosity in conflict. Example from the book is where she was working on an almost finished project & IT said they had to revert back a section to an old school method. She completely shut them down, but her teammate went over & discussed with IT and they came up with a solution that would benefit both. It’s about taking the extra effort to be curious to understand the other point of view and find a happy place together.

This week’s challenge is about putting our ego and excuses away and learning how to really apologize. We all make mistakes and learning to really apologize will leave you and the other person feel better.

Think about the last time you apologized to someone. Did it go something like:
“I’m sorry, but you were….”
“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way…”
“I was just kidding, geez, sorry…”
This probably left you both aggravated and didn’t resolve anything.

Next time, try this framework:
“I’m sorry for….This is wrong because…In the future I will….Will you forgive me?
Basically you are acknowledging what you did wrong and why it was wrong. Plus what you wi do differently going forward and requesting forgiveness.

Now on to our challenges:
Easy: Think about a recent apology you made. Was it a good or bad apology using the example and framework above? What could you have said differently?

Medium: Practice your apologies with body language to match. That means not crossing your arms, not staring at the floor, etc. It means looking them in the eyes so they know you are sincere with hands by your sides relaxed.

Hard: Now it’s time to put it into practice. You can use the last apology you messed up and do a redo with the person. Or the next time you need up, use the framework above.

This week is about being responsible for what we bring to the table with our actions and emotions. Relationships should not be transactional having the mindset if they do this then I’ll do that. You cannot control the other persons actions or emotions BUT you have 100% control over your actions and emotions. You choose how you show up in each interaction you have today. So how are you going to choose to show up?

Easy:
Change your mindset from 50/50 to 100/100. Give 100% effort to the relationship. If you both only try for 50 you will always fall short of 100. If you both try to hit the 100, you will more than likely always be above the 100.

Medium:
Keep your side of the street clean. Meaning worry about what you can control and do versus what other people aren’t doing. You cannot control other people so stop trying to.

Hard:
Be intentional with every interaction you have. If you walk into a room in a bad mood you will bring everyone else’s mood down. If you walk into the room smiling you will probably make someone else smile. We can’t control how others feel, but we do have influence with how we show up.

This week’s challenge is about forgiveness and letting go of the grudges you are holding.

Matthew 18:21-35 was one of the passages this week at church. It’s about how God has forgiven our sins so therefore we must forgive others. Which seems like a God moment since that’s this weeks chapter/challenge.

Who do you need to forgive? Who are you holding a grudge against that is probably hurting you more than them? Maybe it’s not someone, but you! God has forgiven you so stop beating yourself up inside. No one is perfect except Him.

Your challenge levels:
Easy: Really truly forgive someone that hurt you. Don’t just say it. Mean it.

Medium: Release that grudge you are holding in your heart. It will make you feel lighter.

Hard: Forgive yourself for something you are not so proud of or regret doing. Everyone makes mistakes. Learn from the mistake and move forward.